Radical Gags weekly
News You Can't Use by Jerry Polner
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In this week's Radical Gags:

Why More People Don't Vote

RNC Hospital -- When we say we don't care, we mean it.

You Want Soup or Congress?

Merlene Discusses Her Strengths and Weaknesses and Where She Would Like To Be In Five Years
 
THE TRUNK -- Over a hundred archived sketches, indexed by topic.



Why More People Don't Vote

NATALIE (Reading from a script): Good afternoon. My name is Natalie. That is not my real name, but a name provided to me for the purpose of facilitating this focus group. Any attempt on your part to contact me or engage me in conversation subsequent to this meeting will not be encouraged or allowed. Permit me to thank you warmly for taking time out of your busy day to participate in this focus group. Each of you has been chosen for this group because on your preliminary questionnaire you self-identified as “Wouldn’t be caught dead voting.” This is a segment that our client is especially interested in reaching out to. Thank you in advance for your integrity and candor. By joining in this focus group with your fellow citizens, you are making a special contribution to the political process.

JOE: We still get fifty bucks for doing this, right?

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