Three Chairs for Dave!

DAVE:
So like I said, I'm definitely interested.

KAPLOWITZ:
In the Parents Against Toxics school location campaign.

DAVE:
Yuh, whatever.

KAPLOWITZ:
You're interested in whatever, or you're interested in the school location campaign.

DAVE:
The school location whatever.

KAPLOWITZ:
That's great. So you read the stuff I sent you?

DAVE:
I never got it.

KAPLOWITZ:
Really.

DAVE:
Yuh, my mail is crazy. So Merlene is still in the group, right?

KAPLOWITZ:
Merlene? Yuh, she's still active. But we need somebody like you who likes to call people up and get them excited about these things.

DAVE:
Well I only got like 12 minutes a month on my phone.

KAPLOWITZ:
That's too bad.

DAVE:
Yuh, it's a bitch. But I could call from work or something. What am I calling them about?

KAPLOWITZ:
Okay, let's go over this again. The school board chairman's brother owns this property on Highway 17. So he wants to build the new junior high school out there where there's no sewer and water lines, no access road, no public transportation, 20 miles away from where everybody lives, instead of building across from where the old one is.

DAVE:
So all I have to do is call people up and tell them that this guy is an asshole.

KAPLOWITZ:
Right. Because if we let him get away with this, it'll use up more energy, more gasoline, cost more to build, and you'll spend half your time driving your kids to and from. All so he can get rich plowing up woods that should stay the way they are.

DAVE:
So does she have a boyfriend?

KAPLOWITZ:
Who?

DAVE:
Who are we talking about. Merlene.

KAPLOWITZ:
Not that I know of. But we were talking about you chairing the school location campaign. Getting people to testify at the public hearings, write letters, demonstrate in the parking lot of his country club, that kind of thing.

DAVE:
Absolutely.

KAPLOWITZ:
So would you be interested in that?

DAVE:
Shouldn't we have a co-chair?

KAPLOWITZ:
Do you have questions about what it means to be the chairman of the campaign?

DAVE:
Does she like to drink?

KAPLOWITZ:
Merlene?

DAVE:
Since you brought her up, yuh.

KAPLOWITZ:
When did I bring her up?

DAVE:
You suggested her for co-chair. And I said does she like to drink.

KAPLOWITZ:
I don't know anything about that.

DAVE:
I'm just asking, Jon.

KAPLOWITZ:
I know you're just asking.

DAVE:
What about music?

KAPLOWITZ:
What about it?

DAVE:
What kind of music does she like?

KAPLOWITZ:
Why would I know about that.

DAVE:
I'm just saying.

KAPLOWITZ:
Alright. Fine. Whatever you want. If you'll chair the campaign, Merlene can co-chair.

DAVE:
I think that would be a great idea.

KAPLOWITZ:
So do I.

DAVE:
So can you call her?